What you and I have been doing on your visits here, and thefeelings you have for Tom doesn't change any of that. It's just another oflife's pleasures...that you've discovered. Don't tear yourself up over it.Continue to enjoy looking at Tom and keeping him in your jack-offfantasies. If somehow you find he feels the same way about you, so be it.Enjoy what comes into your life, Jef. Don't fight it and don't labelyourself as something that you imagine to be abhorrent.During Spring Vacation, Mike. Marine fighting instructor, and his approach involved beating me senseless, then tearing apart the beating to teach me how to respond in such desperate circumstances. It worked, as two really stupid, drug addicts discovered one wintry night as I cut across an empty lot, while walking back to my hotel on the mountain.The first time I sensed trouble was when I saw them separate and walk towards me, but taking care to bracket me as they approached. The two were not very good at beating and robbing. To which she just gave a nod. I took her hands in my hands and placed it on my cheeks. I wanted to be a little romantic and slow since there were 8 hours of travel remaining.She then rested her head on my shoulders, wrapped her arms around my arms and closed her eyes. We both were sitting like lovers in the corner seat. Enjoying the lovely chill breeze from the window. I slowly took her hand and gave 6-7 kisses on her hands after which she gave a deep look into my eyes.That look itself clearly. It was not agood look."Honey, you look fine." Donna came into the bathroom to reassure me."It's just a little messy. We need to do some styling with it is all,come with me."She grabbed her hairbrush from next to the sink and pulled me backinto the bedroom.-June 4thThe blonde portions of my hair were long and thick enough now that Icould sort of do a reverse-combover, and it looked fine even if Ididn't brush it out. I still wanted to style it anyway.My gaze got lost in the mirror as I pulled.
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