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”“What the heck are you talking about?”“Excuse we. Speak us ... We this ... still work...”“Where are you? Who is this?”“This new. We w...rk technique. One ... second?”The voice alternated between normal speech, grainy radio signals, and loudspeaker distortions. Phil rubbed his ear, trying to clear whatever obstructed his hearing.“This work do? Sorry, is this working?”Phil stopped turning, instead glancing straight up into the partially overcast sky. “Yes, but who are you? What is this about?”“One. Before or after a meeting I just listen in to their chatter and pick up on the gossip, what’s (and who’s!) hot. I even pick up the odd babysitting gig, partly for pocket money (students loans, apartment rent, office rent... ) but mostly so I can chat to more kids and work out what makes them tick. There are perhaps half a dozen girls and a couple of boys I know well who have “perfect” lives. Y’know the kind: they’re polite without being timid, bright without being nerdy; sporty without being. The reception hall is a harshly bright room with white walls and white floors and a white table with some cheese and crackers and grapes on toothpicks and popcorn and coffee and a punchbowl full of what tasted like Hi-C. I shook hands with folks and smiled and wanted to get out of there and get to a bar and imbibe a bit.But then Cynthia walked up to me. Cynthia, my first real girlfriend after college. We dated for about 2 years before she gave up on me, realizing I wasn’t ever going to propose.. I asked what was wrong and she said "I finally told you how I feel and you reject me." That's when I started to think "maybe this all is real." I told her that I thought it was all a big practical joke and apologized. She stopped crying, looked up at me and said "really?" I told her everything- that I had a huge crush on her for years, that I often masturbated thinking of her, and that the reason I ran off the day before was that I didn't want her to see the effect she had on me. We locked.
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